Kantian Ethics demands: "Respect the joke, regardless of the consequences"
I've mentioned it before, but one of the credos by which I live is "Respect the joke; Damn the consequences." There are so many situations where you can say or do something funny, with possibly disasterous results to one's own reputation. I'm not talking about instances where a joke is going to hurt or embarrass somebody needlessly; I'm not a member of that bandwagon.
The best- and perhaps only- instance of having to make a choice between saying something funny or keeping it to yourself to further some more-beneficial end involves a woman. Say you've just met a girl at a bar or a party or K-mart or a strip club. She's giving you the eyes, and you estimate there's a Reasonable Chance you could see her naked in the near or very near future if you act a Certain Way. Oftentimes, the way I usually act and the way I should act to persuade a girl to take her top off are exactly the same, or at least not so wildly divergent as to merit discussion or consideration.
But what if a situation arises where I can say something funny? Perhaps it could be construed as slightly offensive, or too silly, or uncool. Perhaps the girl won't get it and will be immediately turned off. In these cases, it's easy to just keep one's mouth shut, and doing so serves a very utilitarian purpose (ie, boobies in the face). But I can't do it. I can't bite my tongue.
Because in many ways, mine is a duty-based system of ethics. An action is no longer moral if I'm not follwing the maxims to which I claim to subscribe. Does the end of motorboating a girl's cans justify the means (ie, chickening out and not making The Joke)? Even if I grant that boobies > self-respect/personal chuckle (which I don't), I'd still make The Joke.
What do I have, if not my unflinching dedication to humor, even if the brand of humor I respect and propagate isn't particularly funny or well-received?
Not a damned thing.
So:
I met a girl at a bar a little while back, and gave her a call last night. She didn't answer, but texted me a few minutes later, explaining that she saw I called, couldn't talk, and that she'd call me tomorrow (today). When she calls, I think it'd be funny to let it go to voicemail, and immediately text her back explaining that I saw she called, can't talk, and will call her in, oh I dunno, 30 seconds. Then, I'll call her in 30 seconds. Do I like this girl? Yes. Is that just a weird fucking thing to do? You bet. Can this course of action ONLY serve to lower my chances of getting paid off, here? Absolutely. But do I think it's funny?
Yup. So it's not even close.
The best- and perhaps only- instance of having to make a choice between saying something funny or keeping it to yourself to further some more-beneficial end involves a woman. Say you've just met a girl at a bar or a party or K-mart or a strip club. She's giving you the eyes, and you estimate there's a Reasonable Chance you could see her naked in the near or very near future if you act a Certain Way. Oftentimes, the way I usually act and the way I should act to persuade a girl to take her top off are exactly the same, or at least not so wildly divergent as to merit discussion or consideration.
But what if a situation arises where I can say something funny? Perhaps it could be construed as slightly offensive, or too silly, or uncool. Perhaps the girl won't get it and will be immediately turned off. In these cases, it's easy to just keep one's mouth shut, and doing so serves a very utilitarian purpose (ie, boobies in the face). But I can't do it. I can't bite my tongue.
Because in many ways, mine is a duty-based system of ethics. An action is no longer moral if I'm not follwing the maxims to which I claim to subscribe. Does the end of motorboating a girl's cans justify the means (ie, chickening out and not making The Joke)? Even if I grant that boobies > self-respect/personal chuckle (which I don't), I'd still make The Joke.
What do I have, if not my unflinching dedication to humor, even if the brand of humor I respect and propagate isn't particularly funny or well-received?
Not a damned thing.
So:
I met a girl at a bar a little while back, and gave her a call last night. She didn't answer, but texted me a few minutes later, explaining that she saw I called, couldn't talk, and that she'd call me tomorrow (today). When she calls, I think it'd be funny to let it go to voicemail, and immediately text her back explaining that I saw she called, can't talk, and will call her in, oh I dunno, 30 seconds. Then, I'll call her in 30 seconds. Do I like this girl? Yes. Is that just a weird fucking thing to do? You bet. Can this course of action ONLY serve to lower my chances of getting paid off, here? Absolutely. But do I think it's funny?
Yup. So it's not even close.
posted by Derek at 11:50 AM
1 Comments:
I like it. I also like that you capitalized Reasonable Chance and Certain Way. That made me chuckle.
If she has any sense of humor there is the small chance she could find it amusing too. If she doesn't have a sense of humor, then you really need to hook up with her because I think it would provide a wealth of awkward stories.
Did I really just type "hook up"?
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